a little break . . . mostly

my blog has been so serious lately. here's just some random thoughts and things which have been on my mind. not too serious today, which i think is needed, at least for myself.

First, the regal catalogue. i got this in the mail, and there are some fun things in there. First:


This is a cute picture, and it wouldn't be so bad, but the caption beneath it says: Now your dog can be warm AND stylish! Really, come on. Now I not only feel guilty for not being stylish myself, I feel guilty that my dog isn't stylish and will be made fun of by all of the other cooler dogs. Sick! Even worse, I don't have a dog to make stylish!




Way to go, Regal. This haircut guy is awesome. Lookit how happy he is!



On another note - i am truly and completly blessed. I was with a bunch of people, good people who i appreciate and enjoy muchly, and we were doing visualization exercises about when we really felt loved. I was thinking and was trying to pick from all of the times running around in my brain - when Janie sat with me in my tent, when ernie bought me a fringe pass, when odie makes me supper, when my mom tells me about her funny and fascinating life. I was astounded and floored when I realized that not everybody shares this experience, and that it is a struggle for some to think of one specific time which they felt completly loved. This has been such a part of my family and my friendships and of my college experience i think i have just taken it for granted. this re-kindles a passion in me, at least mildly, to love people as i have been loved, by Christ and by Christ through others. This used to be my passion, but has lately been taken over by a need for self-protection and basic fear of giving to people. i think i am on the way back . . . albeit slowly. There is such a need to share real, unconditional love to people that everybody needs. someday i will be able to do that again, i hope. i pray.

lastly, i found a great quote/passage which directly answers my question of my last post (a big thanks to all who commented on this post, by the way. Comments are awesome!). This passage has given me unspeakable peace. Problem is, some people consider this author to be pretty much a heretic. i don't, though. And since she is long gone, the text is public domain. Sweet! No danger of being sued! Here it is:


"The continual seeking of the soul pleaseth God full greatly: for it may do no more than seek, suffer and trust. And this is wrought in the soul that hath it, by the Holy Ghost; and the clearness of finding, it is of His special grace, when it is His will. The seeking, with faith, hope, and charity, pleaseth our Lord, adn the finding pleaseth the soul and fulfilleth it with joy. And thus I was learned, to mine understanding, that seeking is as good as beholding, for the time that He will suffer the soul to be in travail. It is God's will that we seek Him, to the beholding of Him, for by that He shall shew us Himself of His special grace when He will. And how a soul shall have Him in its beholding, He shall teach Himself, and that is most worship to Him and profit to thyself, an d(the soul thus) most receiveth of meekness and virtues with the grace and leading of the Holy Ghost. For a soul that only fasteneth itself on to God with very trust, either by seeking or in beholding, it is the most worship that it may do to Him."
- Julian of Norwich